Forgiveness is a lesson that continues to confront me. When I think I might just have mastered it (maybe?) I realize there is more to it still. Last night I was expressing some frustration on this subject with one of my children. I feel like I have forgiven individuals, but at the same time I don't feel I can trust them again. I grow tired of the pain they inflict. When the subject comes up it is a tender subject for me, my feelings are still fresh. As I talked with my son he shared with me some thoughts or ideas he has felt he has learned on the subject.As he Shared, it seemed to make sense.
We are asked to forgive others their trespasses. No where in the scriptures are we instructed to forget. We are instructed to use righteous judgement. If you know someone has a tendency and that tendency has repeated itself, you can judge that tendency. You don't have to put yourself in the situation of being lashed out at again. In forgiving an individual it is alright to remove yourself from future situations that can cause you discomfort, and that individual an opportunity to dig a deeper hole for themselves. In doing this you can find peace, and spare that individual sin.
In doing this it doesn't mean you go out of your way to flee them or turn your back on them. When they turn to you for help, you can treat them like children of a loving Father. In doing so we find the opportunity to exercise and develop charity, the Christ like love we have been commanded to desire and obtain. As we forgive we can find peace in turning it over to the Savior. The Savior can give us the tools to work with as we strive to become successful in our own dealings with life's little adventures.
It is amazing to me how keenly thought out Heavenly Father's plan is. He never takes from us our agency. As we learn to turn our will to His we can find peace in unexpected places by means we may not have considered. Strength can be found in those moments we feel we may buckle any moment to the weight of the world. What a blessing to have an older brother who loves us as He does, and Father who has trusted us as He has.
Update: In searching for help and comfort I came upon this article and thought I would make it available. https://www.lds.org/ensign/1991/06/of-you-it-is-required-to-forgive?lang=eng
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